Psalm 107:1-24 (KJV): He filleth the hungry soul with goodness

From Psalms

Psalm 107

¹O give thanks unto the LORD, for he is good:
      for his mercy endureth for ever.
²Let the redeemed of the LORD say so,
      whom he hath redeemed from the hand of the enemy;
³And gathered them out of the lands,
      from the east, and from the west, from the north, and from the south.

⁴They wandered in the wilderness in a solitary way;
      they found no city to dwell in.
⁵Hungry and thirsty,
      their soul fainted in them.
⁶Then they cried unto the LORD in their trouble,
      and he delivered them out of their distresses.
⁷And he led them forth by the right way,
      that they might go to a city of habitation.
⁸Oh that men would praise the LORD for his goodness,
      and for his wonderful works to the children of men!
⁹For he satisfieth the longing soul,
      and filleth the hungry soul with goodness.

¹⁰Such as sit in darkness and in the shadow of death,
      being bound in affliction and iron;
¹¹Because they rebelled against the words of God,
      and contemned the counsel of the most High:
¹²Therefore he brought down their heart with labour;
      they fell down, and there was none to help.
¹³Then they cried unto the LORD in their trouble,
      and he saved them out of their distresses.
¹⁴He brought them out of darkness and the shadow of death,
      and brake their bands in sunder.
¹⁵Oh that men would praise the LORD for his goodness,
      and for his wonderful works to the children of men!
¹⁶For he hath broken the gates of brass,
      and cut the bars of iron in sunder.

¹⁷Fools because of their transgression,
      and because of their iniquities, are afflicted.
¹⁸Their soul abhorreth all manner of meat;
      and they draw near unto the gates of death.
¹⁹Then they cry unto the LORD in their trouble,
      and he saveth them out of their distresses.
²⁰He sent his word, and healed them,
      and delivered them from their destructions.
²¹Oh that men would praise the LORD for his goodness,
      and for his wonderful works to the children of men!
²²And let them sacrifice the sacrifices of thanksgiving,
      and declare his works with rejoicing.

²³They that go down to the sea in ships,
      that do business in great waters;
²⁴These see the works of the LORD,
      and his wonders in the deep.

Here's some good news - the Lord heals the afflicted and fills their cups that are bottomless for other things.  As addicts were pursued happiness with a cup that had no bottom.  The more we got the more we needed - because we had ignored the word of God.  So, he let us destroy ourselves and our lives in our own ways.  Until we hit bottom, we were not ready to listen to anyone else - let alone God.  At least that was the story for me...and it does seem common.

Then through the first three steps, of the 12 steps, I let God into my life and started paying attention to his word.  I even cried out to the Lord in my struggle.  As I started to create a relationship with God in those early steps he started to work in my life.  My marriage is being repaired.  My relationship with my sons is a healthy one.  My demons and enemies do not have the stranglehold over my life that they once did.  "He sent his word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions." (verse 20).

And so I praise the Lord, Hallelu Yah, for bringing peace to my life, and bringing goodness into my life.  There is still much work to be done - but I, the AA big book promises, was amazed before I was halfway through.  For that, and all of this, I give thanks to God.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 106:23-48 (KJV): Nevertheless He regarded their affliction when he heard their cry

From Psalms

Psalm 106:23-48

²⁴Yea, they despised the pleasant land,
      they believed not his word:
²⁵But murmured in their tents,
      and hearkened not unto the voice of the LORD.
²⁶Therefore he lifted up his hand against them,
      to overthrow them in the wilderness:
²⁷To overthrow their seed also among the nations,
      and to scatter them in the lands.

²⁸They joined themselves also unto Baalpeor,
      and ate the sacrifices of the dead.
²⁹Thus they provoked him to anger with their inventions:
      and the plague brake in upon them.
³⁰Then stood up Phinehas, and executed judgment:
      and so the plague was stayed.
³¹And that was counted unto him for righteousness
      unto all generations for evermore.

³²They angered him also at the waters of strife,
      so that it went ill with Moses for their sakes:
³³Because they provoked his spirit,
      so that he spake unadvisedly with his lips.

³⁴They did not destroy the nations,
      concerning whom the LORD commanded them:
³⁵But were mingled among the heathen,
      and learned their works.
³⁶And they served their idols:
      which were a snare unto them.
³⁷Yea, they sacrificed their sons
      and their daughters unto devils,
³⁸And shed innocent blood,
      even the blood of their sons and of their daughters,
whom they sacrificed unto the idols of Canaan:
      and the land was polluted with blood.
³⁹Thus were they defiled with their own works,
      and went a whoring with their own inventions.

⁴⁰Therefore was the wrath of the LORD kindled against his people,
      insomuch that he abhorred his own inheritance.
⁴¹And he gave them into the hand of the heathen;
      and they that hated them ruled over them.
⁴²Their enemies also oppressed them,
      and they were brought into subjection under their hand.
⁴³Many times did he deliver them;
      but they provoked him with their counsel,
      and were brought low for their iniquity.

⁴⁴Nevertheless he regarded their affliction,
      when he heard their cry:
⁴⁵And he remembered for them his covenant,
      and repented according to the multitude of his mercies.
⁴⁶He made them also to be pitied
      of all those that carried them captives.

⁴⁷Save us, O LORD our God,
      and gather us from among the heathen,
to give thanks unto thy holy name,
      and to triumph in thy praise.

⁴⁸Blessed be the LORD God of Israel
      from everlasting to everlasting:
and let all the people say, Amen.

Praise ye the LORD.

Every verse I read this morning, from 23 to 43, I kept looking for the Isrealites fate to turn.  I knew the story so I knew it would eventually.  But, like a movie that keeps you on the edge of your seat it just seemed like nothing could go right for the Isrealites.  They constantly made bad choices.  They constantly angered God.

In these verses, I saw some similarities with my own story.  All too often I fall into the snares of our society.  All too often I fall for the marketing that we are constantly inundated with.  The sex, the pursuit of money, the lust for power, the myths, and the out-and-out lies.  That's not even to speak of the selfish and sinful things I did when I lived in my addiction.  Certainly I supported the sex industry (of porn, strippers, and prostitutes) and in that it could be said I sacrificed our sons and daughters.  My faith was in the idols of my addictions and surely I must have angered God, so he let me wander so far that I risked everything I truly valued.

Thankfully though, along came verse 44.  Along came the grace of God - Amazing Grace, indeed.  "Nevertheless, He regarded their affliction when he heard their cry."  Save us O Lord.  And so it was just like this for me.  When he saw that I was ready and I could stand the suffering no longer, and I called out to Him, he took notice of my cry.  He showed his grace on me and began to work in my life.  Praise ye the Lord.

I pray that for other addicts out there, especially those that still suffer, that they can see there is way out from all of that.  That through God the suffering can be "stayed" (verse 30).  That God can work in anyone's life as He did in mine, through the 12 steps, and through meetings and other addicts.  God be with you.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 106:1-23 (KJV): O visit me with thy salvation

From Psalms

Psalm 106:1-23

¹Praise ye the LORD.

O give thanks unto the LORD; for he is good:
      for his mercy endureth for ever.
²Who can utter the mighty acts of the LORD?
      who can shew forth all his praise?
³Blessed are they that keep judgment,
      and he that doeth righteousness at all times.
⁴Remember me, O LORD, with the favour that thou bearest unto thy people:
      O visit me with thy salvation;
⁵That I may see the good of thy chosen,
      that I may rejoice in the gladness of thy nation,
      that I may glory with thine inheritance.

⁶We have sinned with our fathers,
      we have committed iniquity, we have done wickedly.
⁷Our fathers understood not thy wonders in Egypt;
they remembered not the multitude of thy mercies;
      but provoked him at the sea, even at the Red sea.
⁸Nevertheless he saved them for his name's sake,
      that he might make his mighty power to be known.
⁹He rebuked the Red sea also, and it was dried up:
      so he led them through the depths, as through the wilderness.
¹⁰And he saved them from the hand of him that hated them,
      and redeemed them from the hand of the enemy.
¹¹And the waters covered their enemies:
      there was not one of them left.
¹²Then believed they his words;
      they sang his praise.

¹³They soon forgat his works;
      they waited not for his counsel:
¹⁴But lusted exceedingly in the wilderness,
      and tempted God in the desert.
¹⁵And he gave them their request;
      but sent leanness into their soul.

¹⁶They envied Moses also in the camp,
      and Aaron the saint of the LORD.
¹⁷The earth opened and swallowed up Dathan
      and covered the company of Abiram.
¹⁸And a fire was kindled in their company;
      the flame burned up the wicked.

¹⁹They made a calf in Horeb,
      and worshipped the molten image.
²⁰Thus they changed their glory
      into the similitude of an ox that eateth grass.
²¹They forgat God their saviour,
      which had done great things in Egypt;
²²Wondrous works in the land of Ham,
      and terrible things by the Red sea.
²³Therefore he said that he would destroy them,
      had not Moses his chosen
stood before him in the breach,
      to turn away his wrath, lest he should destroy them.

Recovery is a process of salvation.  I have come to learn that my addiction was merely a symptom of other things that were wrong in my life and in my heart.  This transformation often fills us with new understandings and revelations and open new opportunities.  However, we must be careful with this gift.  An alcoholic that I look-up to once advised me that I should try not to make any big adjustments in my life in the first year of sobriety.  And that probably holds true until I've completed the 12 steps, if that takes longer than the first year of sobriety.

It's a big temptation, with the freedom and liberation from addiction to try and "reinvent ourselves" and go-out and do something big.  However, there's a few reasons why a recovering addict should try to avoid this temptation.  First, as recovering addicts, we are learning things about ourselves that had been hidden and that we had lied about for years.  It will take focused effort to expose and understand those things.  Significant changes in our lives will only complicate recovery, and distract from the healing process and work that needs to be done.

Everyday I pray for his guidance, to show me the path, keep me focused, and help me make good decisions.  If He can provide this for me I need nothing else.  I am still on step 9, and as you can see, I still have some 40 odd psalms to complete.  There are many things that I would like to do in my life, but I know for now my focus needs to be with my recovery and turning things over to God.  I may be working on recovery this for sometime, possibly forever, but for right now it needs be a priority over many other things I could be doing.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 105:28-45 (KJV): He opened the rock, and waters gushed out

From Psalms

Psalm 105:28-45

²⁸He sent darkness, and made it dark;
      and they rebelled not against his word.
²⁹He turned their waters into blood,
      and slew their fish.
³⁰Their land brought forth frogs in abundance,
      in the chambers of their kings.
³¹He spake, and there came divers sorts of flies,
      and lice in all their coasts.
³²He gave them hail for rain,
      and flaming fire in their land.
³³He smote their vines also and their fig trees;
      and brake the trees of their coasts.
³⁴He spake, and the locusts came,
      and caterpillers, and that without number,
³⁵And did eat up all the herbs in their land,
      and devoured the fruit of their ground.
³⁶He smote also all the firstborn in their land,
      the chief of all their strength.

³⁷He brought them forth also with silver and gold:
      and there was not one feeble person among their tribes.
³⁸Egypt was glad when they departed:
      for the fear of them fell upon them.
³⁹He spread a cloud for a covering;
      and fire to give light in the night.
⁴⁰The people asked, and he brought quails,
      and satisfied them with the bread of heaven.
⁴¹He opened the rock, and the waters gushed out;
      they ran in the dry places like a river.

⁴²For he remembered his holy promise,
      and Abraham his servant.
⁴³And he brought forth his people with joy,
      and his chosen with gladness:
⁴⁴And gave them the lands of the heathen:
      and they inherited the labour of the people;
⁴⁵That they might observe his statutes,
      and keep his laws.

Praise ye the LORD.  (Hallelu Yah)

God had big plans for Moses - and the psalmist shows Gods power and how he uses people in Psalm 105. It's Psalms like these that make me ask "What is is God's will (or plan) for my life?" When I ask this question I'm usually thinking in terms of what I'm doing. Whether that's volunteering my time or whether that's going abroad as part of a mission group, which I have been considering for many years. I realized in reading Praying Like Jesus by James Mulholland that that's not necessarily how God sees it.

I think He is more concerned with, as Mulholland puts so eloquently in his book, who each of us become more than what we do. He goes on to say that we need focus on God's will before our own needs, as Jesus showed in Matthew 6. He further goes on to say in order to focus on the will of God we must focus on the kingdom of God. This he shows using Luke 21 (KJV) that the kingdom of God is within you. So when we pray, "Thy kingdom come," we are making a commitment to allow the allow God's kingdom to be established through us.

So, as I seek His plan for me I will not be trying to replicate Moses' or David's greatness. I will be looking to make good decisions and looking for ways to establish His kingdom. I will be looking and praying for ways that my life reflects his love and for ways to become a good peron. One day at a time.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 105:1-27 (KJV): Make known his deeds among the people

From Psalms

Psalm 105:1-27

¹O give thanks unto the LORD;
      call upon his name: make known his deeds among the people.
²Sing unto him, sing psalms unto him:
      talk ye of all his wondrous works.
³Glory ye in his holy name:
      let the heart of them rejoice that seek the LORD.
⁴Seek the LORD, and his strength:
      seek his face evermore.

⁵Remember his marvellous works that he hath done;
      his wonders, and the judgments of his mouth;
⁶O ye seed of Abraham his servant,
      ye children of Jacob his chosen.
⁷He is the LORD our God:
      his judgments are in all the earth.

⁸He hath remembered his covenant for ever,
      the word which he commanded to a thousand generations.
⁹Which covenant he made with Abraham,
      and his oath unto Isaac;
¹⁰And confirmed the same unto Jacob for a law,
      and to Israel for an everlasting covenant:
¹¹Saying, Unto thee will I give the land of Canaan,
      the lot of your inheritance:

¹²When they were but a few men in number;
      yea, very few, and strangers in it.
¹³When they went from one nation to another,
      from one kingdom to another people;
¹⁴He suffered no man to do them wrong:
      yea, he reproved kings for their sakes;
¹⁵Saying, Touch not mine anointed,
      and do my prophets no harm.

¹⁶Moreover he called for a famine upon the land:
      he brake the whole staff of bread.
¹⁷He sent a man before them,
      even Joseph, who was sold for a servant:
¹⁸Whose feet they hurt with fetters:
      he was laid in iron:
¹⁹Until the time that his word came:
      the word of the LORD tried him.
²⁰The king sent and loosed him;
      even the ruler of the people, and let him go free.
²¹He made him lord of his house,
      and ruler of all his substance:
²²To bind his princes at his pleasure;
      and teach his senators wisdom.

²³Israel also came into Egypt;
      and Jacob sojourned in the land of Ham.
²⁴And he increased his people greatly;
      and made them stronger than their enemies.
²⁵He turned their heart to hate his people,
      to deal subtilly with his servants.
²⁶He sent Moses his servant;
      and Aaron whom he had chosen.
²⁷They shewed his signs among them,
      and wonders in the land of Ham.

The good Lord giveth and the good taketh away.  Everything we have is from blessings of the Lord.  Everything we lose, whether good or bad, is part of His plan, too.  And so I need to give credit where is due. I try to give credit to God as much as I can.  However, its not a task that's easy as it should be.

Sometimes, when I'm in certain situations, I attribute good fortune to luck instead of being blessed.  This is something that I am working on changing.  The few situations where my sobriety comes up I need to be more consistent about giving credit to God.  Although it required my commitment, the strength and support I needed to be sober was provided by God.  He provided this strength in the psalms that I would pray (almost) daily.  He provided the support I needed through the people in my life, through the people who love me and the other addicts who helped show me a path.

When people compliment me on my family my instant reaction isn't always to say, "I am so blessed," and it needs to be.  I am sure this is true for many people...and many addicts.  But I think if I can reinforce the role of God in my life maybe I can truly start to show the transformative potential God has for all of us.  And if other people can see the change God has brought to my life then maybe they will start to seek His power in theirs.  That's just one more way I reflect the love of God in this crazy world.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 104:18-35 (KJV): My meditation of him shall be sweet

From Psalms

Psalm 104:18-35

¹⁸The high hills are a refuge for the wild goats;
      and the rocks for the conies.

¹⁹He appointed the moon for seasons:
      the sun knoweth his going down.
²⁰Thou makest darkness, and it is night:
      wherein all the beasts of the forest do creep forth.
²¹The young lions roar after their prey,
      and seek their meat from God.
²²The sun ariseth, they gather themselves together,
      and lay them down in their dens.
²³Man goeth forth unto his work
      and to his labour until the evening.

²⁴O LORD, how manifold are thy works!
      in wisdom hast thou made them all:
      the earth is full of thy riches.
²⁵So is this great and wide sea,
      wherein are things creeping innumerable,
      both small and great beasts.
²⁶There go the ships:
      there is that leviathan, whom thou hast made to play therein.

²⁷These wait all upon thee;
      that thou mayest give them their meat in due season.
²⁸That thou givest them they gather:
      thou openest thine hand, they are filled with good.
²⁹Thou hidest thy face,
      they are troubled:
thou takest away their breath,
      they die, and return to their dust.
³⁰Thou sendest forth thy spirit,
      they are created:
      and thou renewest the face of the earth.

³¹The glory of the LORD shall endure for ever:
      the LORD shall rejoice in his works.
³²He looketh on the earth, and it trembleth:
      he toucheth the hills, and they smoke.

³³I will sing unto the LORD as long as I live:
      I will sing praise to my God while I have my being.
³⁴My meditation of him shall be sweet:
      I will be glad in the LORD.
³⁵Let the sinners be consumed out of the earth,
      and let the wicked be no more.

Bless thou the LORD, O my soul.

Praise ye the LORD. (Hallelu Yah)

The earth is full of His riches - My meditation of Him shall be sweet.  Some days when I log in to talk about the impact of my prayers of psalms its hard to articulate the change they make in my life.  Prayer and God have become such a big part of my life.  There is so much noise in our lives it drowns out our prayers and relationship with God.

I just realized this recently when I gave a up radio in my car and at home, as well as TV at home - for Lent, of course.  Every now and then I will be somewhere where there is TV or radio and the discussions and topics are so shallow, caustic, and irrelevant.  Not until I gave this up did realize how inundated we are by these messages that I had taken these topics as normal.  However, after removing it from my life I quickly see how unnecessary it all is.  You may be thinking how do I keep in tune with what's going on...that's easy, news.google.com.  Don't be fooled - what is on TV and radio, being sold as educational or news or even entertainment, is nothing productive.  It's only distractions.

The point is that without this noise, I am able to focus.  Focus on God.  Focus on what's important.  Focus on my prayer and meditation.  Focus on His riches, which are all over the earth.  Focus on my recovery.  It's a very different experience.  I thank God for the opportunity to mediate instead of being distracted.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 104:1-17 (KJV):He bring forth...bread which strengtheneth a man's heart

From Psalms

Psalm 104:1-17

¹Bless the LORD, O my soul.

O LORD my God, thou art very great;
      thou art clothed with honour and majesty.
²Who coverest thyself with light as with a garment:
      who stretchest out the heavens like a curtain:
³Who layeth the beams of his chambers in the waters:
      who maketh the clouds his chariot:
      who walketh upon the wings of the wind:
⁴Who maketh his angels spirits;
      his ministers a flaming fire:

⁵Who laid the foundations of the earth,
      that it should not be removed for ever.
⁶Thou coveredst it with the deep as with a garment:
      the waters stood above the mountains.
⁷At thy rebuke they fled;
      at the voice of thy thunder they hasted away.
⁸They go up by the mountains;
      they go down by the valleys
      unto the place which thou hast founded for them.
⁹Thou hast set a bound that they may not pass over;
      that they turn not again to cover the earth.

¹⁰He sendeth the springs into the valleys,
      which run among the hills.
¹¹They give drink to every beast of the field:
      the wild asses quench their thirst.
¹²By them shall the fowls of the heaven have their habitation,
      which sing among the branches.
¹³He watereth the hills from his chambers:
      the earth is satisfied with the fruit of thy works.
¹⁴He causeth the grass to grow for the cattle,
      and herb for the service of man:
      that he may bring forth food out of the earth;
¹⁵And wine that maketh glad the heart of man,
      and oil to make his face to shine,
      and bread which strengtheneth man's heart.
¹⁶The trees of the LORD are full of sap;
      the cedars of Lebanon, which he hath planted;
¹⁷Where the birds make their nests:
      as for the stork, the fir trees are her house.

The past 17 months of psalms and 12 steps have brought me closer to God - I now know what it means to have a relationship with God.  He laid the foundations of the earth (verse 5) and he has a plan for each one of us.  In that 17 months I have developed a strong faith that anything is possible through him.

Today, God gives me my daily bread in psalm 104.  He bring forth bread, which strengthens my heart (verse 15).  And proverbial wine to make glad my heart.  This has been a journey.  This didn't happen overnight.  Everyday I let God into my life more and more.  And as I do, I become a new person.

Before, prayer was not a daily part of my life.  Now I can't imagine a day without it.  Before, I didn't know where I fit in God's world.  Now I know where he is in mine.  Before, I didn't understand grace.  Now I have received more than any person ever deserves.  Before, I tried to fill a cup that had no bottom with things that quickly lost their meaning.  Now my cup overflows with the fruits of the Lord.

Praise the Lord, oh my soul, who showed me that sobriety is more than just abstaining from addiction.  Sobriety is about inner peace.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 103 (KJV): Bless the Lord, ye his angels

From Psalms

Psalm 103
(Of David.)

¹Bless the LORD, O my soul:
      and all that is within me, bless his holy name.
²Bless the LORD, O my soul,
      and forget not all his benefits:
³Who forgiveth all thine iniquities;
      who healeth all thy diseases;
⁴Who redeemeth thy life from destruction;
      who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies;
⁵Who satisfieth thy mouth with good things;
      so that thy youth is renewed like the eagle's.

⁶The LORD executeth righteousness
      and judgment for all that are oppressed.

⁷He made known his ways unto Moses,
      his acts unto the children of Israel.
⁸The LORD is merciful and gracious,
      slow to anger, and plenteous in mercy.
⁹He will not always chide:
      neither will he keep his anger for ever.
¹⁰He hath not dealt with us after our sins;
      nor rewarded us according to our iniquities.
¹¹For as the heaven is high above the earth,
      so great is his mercy toward them that fear him.
¹²As far as the east is from the west,
      so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.
¹³Like as a father pitieth his children,
      so the LORD pitieth them that fear him.
¹⁴For he knoweth our frame;
      he remembereth that we are dust.

¹⁵As for man, his days are as grass:
      as a flower of the field, so he flourisheth.
¹⁶For the wind passeth over it, and it is gone;
      and the place thereof shall know it no more.
¹⁷But the mercy of the LORD
      is from everlasting to everlasting upon them that fear him,
      and his righteousness unto children's children;
¹⁸To such as keep his covenant,
      and to those that remember his commandments to do them.

¹⁹The LORD hath prepared his throne in the heavens;
      and his kingdom ruleth over all.

²⁰Bless the LORD, ye his angels,
      that excel in strength, that do his commandments,
      hearkening unto the voice of his word.
²¹Bless ye the LORD, all ye his hosts;
      ye ministers of his, that do his pleasure.
²²Bless the LORD, all his works
      in all places of his dominion:

bless the LORD, O my soul.

You are his angel says the psalmist in verse 20.  You are one of his ministers that do his work.  He means you.  He means me.  He cares about and loves each one of us.  He has a plan for each of us - and that includes me, even though I am undeserving.  That includes me even though I wander from time to time.  That includes me even though I lie, covet, and cheat.

For he forgives my iniquities.  The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and full of of mercy.  So, I will bless the Lord, O my soul.  Hallelujah.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 102 (KJV): A prayer of an afflicted man

From Psalms

Psalm 102
(A prayer of an afflicted man.  When he is faint and pours out his lament before the LORD.)

¹Hear my prayer, O LORD,
      and let my cry come unto thee.
²Hide not thy face from me
      in the day when I am in trouble;
incline thine ear unto me:
      in the day when I call answer me speedily.

³For my days are consumed like smoke,
      and my bones are burned as an hearth.
⁴My heart is smitten, and withered like grass;
      so that I forget to eat my bread.
⁵By reason of the voice of my groaning
      my bones cleave to my skin.
⁶I am like a pelican of the wilderness:
      I am like an owl of the desert.
⁷I watch, and am as a
      sparrow alone upon the house top.
⁸Mine enemies reproach me all the day;
      and they that are mad against me are sworn against me.
⁹For I have eaten ashes like bread,
      and mingled my drink with weeping.
¹⁰Because of thine indignation and thy wrath:
      for thou hast lifted me up, and cast me down.
¹¹My days are like a shadow that declineth;
      and I am withered like grass.

¹²But thou, O LORD, shall endure for ever;
      and thy remembrance unto all generations.
¹³Thou shalt arise, and have mercy upon Zion:
      for the time to favour her,
      yea, the set time, is come.
¹⁴For thy servants take pleasure in her stones,
      and favour the dust thereof.
¹⁵So the heathen shall fear the name of the LORD,
      and all the kings of the earth thy glory.
¹⁶When the LORD shall build up Zion,
      he shall appear in his glory.
¹⁷He will regard the prayer of the destitute,
      and not despise their prayer.

¹⁸This shall be written for the generation to come:
      and the people which shall be created shall praise the LORD.
¹⁹For he hath looked down from the height of his sanctuary;
      from heaven did the LORD behold the earth;
²⁰To hear the groaning of the prisoner;
      to loose those that are appointed to death;
²¹To declare the name of the LORD in Zion,
      and his praise in Jerusalem;
²²When the people are gathered together,
      and the kingdoms, to serve the LORD.

²³He weakened my strength in the way;
      he shortened my days.
²⁴I said, O my God,
      take me not away in the midst of my days:
      thy years are throughout all generations.
²⁵Of old hast thou laid the foundation of the earth:
      and the heavens are the work of thy hands.
²⁶They shall perish, but thou shalt endure:
      yea, all of them shall wax old like a garment;
as a vesture shalt thou change them,
      and they shall be changed:
²⁷But thou art the same,
      and thy years shall have no end.
²⁸The children of thy servants shall continue,
      and their seed shall be established before thee.

Afflictions can come in many shapes and forms.  For the addict it is a self affliction.  We, in our own decisions cause our own suffering and hardships.  We choose the numbing of our addiction to help problems over facing them on, despite the impact on lives and relationships.  This psalm tells the tale of a person who has hit bottom - much like our own stories of hitting bottom through alcohol, drugs, sex, food, etc.  We don't realize we've been paying for our addiction to everything that is valuable slowly spending away our marriages, friendships, and family.  All the while we spend our away our money and accomplishments all the while the chains of addiction lock us in and we have no longer any control.

It's at this point we recite psalm 102 in some form, "Hear my prayer, O Lord; let my cry for help come to you."  Many have been there and never want to experience it, again.  This keeps us committed to our recovery.  I read a quote from Dr. Bob Rotella (a sports coach) recently about what commitment means.  "I sometimes use the example of a chicken, a pig, and their relative contributions to breakfast.  The chicken is involved in breakfast.  The pig is committed to it."  To understand this is to understand what it means to be fully committed to recovery and to know that "half measures availed us nothing."  And in the same way we, addicts in recovery, commit our lives to God because we know he is persistent and we came to believe that He could restore us to sanity.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 101 (KJV): A froward heart shall depart from me

From Psalms

Psalm 101
(Of David.  A psalm.)

¹I will sing of mercy and judgment:
      unto thee, O LORD, will I sing.
²I will behave myself wisely in a perfect way.
      O when wilt thou come unto me?
I will walk within my house
      with a perfect heart.
³I will set no wicked thing
      before mine eyes:

I hate the work of them that turn aside;
      it shall not cleave to me.
⁴A froward heart shall depart from me:
      I will not know a wicked person.

⁵Whoso privily slandereth his neighbour,
      him will I cut off:
him that hath an high look and a proud heart
      will not I suffer.

⁶Mine eyes shall be upon the faithful of the land,
      that they may dwell with me:
he that walketh in a perfect way,
      he shall serve me.

⁷He that worketh deceit
      shall not dwell within my house:
he that telleth lies
      shall not tarry in my sight.

⁸I will early destroy
      all the wicked of the land;
that I may cut off all wicked doers
      from the city of the LORD.

This is a strong psalm - especially in the King James Version.  "I will early destroy the wicked of the land."  So let me make sure I understand it.  First, I will become perfect - never lie, cheat, covet, or steal.  I have a long way to go.  Next, to help me become perfect I will shift my vision from evil to good.  I will not know any evil person.  Let me think about this.  Anyone who has lied, cheated, or stolen...I can ignore and forget I ever met?  " Whoso privily slandereth his neighbour...him that hath an high look and a proud heart..." Somehow, that's not all bad but seems kind of limiting because that's going to be a lot of people.

Despite its strong tone and disregard of forgiveness that Jesus taught there is a valid point here that I have come to learn in recovery.  Recovery is about a change in your heart.  Froward means: obstinate, willful, disobedient, fractious, wayward, unmanageable, difficult.  To me that rings true of the addict's heart.  In order to change your heart you need to change the way you think.  You need to be able to remove yourself from situations and relationships that lead you down your path to addiction.  You need to remove those influences from your life and never look upon them, again.

For example, if inevitably every time you go out to a company function, as an alcoholic, you pick up a beer - then you need to stop going to company functions.  Or if every time you go out of town on business you revert to your sex addictions - you need to stop going out of town on business.  At least until you have ways to manage these situations or relationships with relapsing into your addiction.  It may mean severing old friendships, or even changing jobs or careers.  For many people this is impossible - which is why they find themselves back in their addiction.

There is indeed a stronger point to this psalm, that we need to not only root out this evil in our world and everywhere we see it.  My thought on that is that once I clean my own house I will take on that endeavor.  However, for now I will focus on those things that most impact my sobriety and removing the evil from my life.  Once I can say that I am "behaving wisely in a perfect way," then I will be ready to work on destroying all evil.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 100 (KJV): Serve the Lord with gladness

From Psalms

Psalm 100
(A psalm.  For giving thanks.)

¹Make a joyful noise unto the LORD, all ye lands.
²    Serve the LORD with gladness: come before his presence with singing.
³Know ye that the LORD he is God:
      it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves;
      we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.

⁴Enter into his gates with thanksgiving,
      and into his courts with praise:
      be thankful unto him, and bless his name.
⁵For the LORD is good;
      his mercy is everlasting;
      and his truth endureth to all generations.

I am blessed that I have the opportunities to reflect the love of God.  It is not an obligation to volunteer and and help others in their time of need - it is a blessing to have the opportunity.  I do it gladly.  For those opportunities I am grateful because the truth of the matter is that it enriches my life as much as it enriches the other people's lives.

This blog has given me several such opportunities - especially with those people who also struggle with addiction.  When I help them in their recovery I, too, become stronger and more firm and resolute in my sobriety.  I am often forced to be more honest with myself and more honest with God and the cycle continues that my life is more meaningful.  For all of this I consider my life blessed and for that I give thanks to the Lord.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 99 (KJV): They called upon the Lord, and he answered them

From Psalms

Psalm 99

¹The LORD reigneth;
      let the people tremble:
he sitteth between the cherubims;
      let the earth be moved.
²The LORD is great in Zion;
      and he is high above all the people.
³Let them praise thy great and terrible name;
      for it is holy.

⁴The king's strength also loveth judgment;
      thou dost establish equity,
thou executest judgment and righteousness
      in Jacob.
⁵Exalt ye the LORD our God,
      and worship at his footstool;
for he is holy.

⁶Moses and Aaron among his priests,
      and Samuel among them that call upon his name;
they called upon the LORD,
      and he answered them.
⁷He spake unto them in the cloudy pillar:
      they kept his testimonies, and the ordinance that he gave them.

⁸Thou answeredst them,
      O LORD our God:
thou wast a God that forgavest them,
      though thou tookest vengeance of their inventions.
⁹Exalt the LORD our God,
      and worship at his holy hill;
for the LORD our God is holy.

Samuel called upon the Lord when the Isrealites were in fear of the Philistines.  1 Samuel 7:9, "He cried out to the LORD on Isreal's behalf, and the LORD answered him."  It continues into verses and 11 as the Philistines draw near for battle, "But that day the LORD thundered with loud thunder against the Philistines and threw them into such panic that they were routed before the Isrealites."  Then the Isrealites pursued them out of mitzpah, slaughtering them, so the Philistines were subdued and didn't invade Israel territory again.

Sometimes I forget to call on the Lord when I am in need.  I think, "I've got this under control,"..."I can handle this,"..."I can control this."  There is a lot that I can learn from Samuel.  Among other things he taught the Isrealites to give up false gods and idols.  And here in 1 Samuel 7 he shows how we can call on God in even the most dire circumstances.

As I continue to build my sobriety I continue to learn from Samuel - to call upon the Lord.  To stop trying to control every aspect of what happens in my life...and to turn it over to God, to the will of God.  I know as soon as I do, and he has shown this, that he will answer.  For my addictions are not unlike the Philistines.  They would destroy me if I let them into my life, again.  However, they can be conquered when I am willing to turn my problems over to the Lord.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 98 (KJV): Sing unto the Lord with...the voice of a psalm

From Psalms

Psalm 98

¹O sing unto the LORD a new song;
      for he hath done marvellous things:
his right hand, and his holy arm,
      hath gotten him the victory.

²The LORD hath made known his salvation:
      his righteousness hath he openly shewed in the sight of the heathen.
³He hath remembered his mercy
      and his truth toward the house of Israel:
all the ends of the earth have seen
      the salvation of our God.

⁴Make a joyful noise unto the LORD, all the earth:
      make a loud noise, and rejoice, and sing praise.
⁵Sing unto the LORD with the harp;
     with the harp, and the voice of a psalm.
⁶With trumpets and sound of cornet
      make a joyful noise before the LORD, the King.

⁷Let the sea roar, and the fulness thereof;
      the world, and they that dwell therein.
⁸Let the floods clap their hands:
      let the hills be joyful together
⁹Before the LORD;
      for he cometh to judge the earth:
with righteousness shall he judge the world,
      and the people with equity.

Let the floods clap and the sea roar.  Let the hills be joyful together.  Even nature sings its song to the Lord.  Today, I will be thankful to the Lord for all of his gifts.  Today I will look past all of the little things that seem like problems, things that create anger and frustrations.  Because in the grand scheme of things they are not really that big...and are significantly overshadowed by the blessings of the Lord.

Everyday when I wake up I have a choice.  I can choose to see the hope and promise that a psalm offers - and can sing joyous thanks to the Lord.  Or I can choose to live in a state that is something less that forces me to see my addictions that are an option, maybe even a necessity.

Today, like most sober days, I will choose to see the hope.  To see the good, and God, in those around me.  Today I will choose to sing to the Lord in the voice of a psalm.  Today has all the hope of a joyful psalm - and I will share that with those who also make the same choice as me.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 97 (KJV): Ye that love the Lord, hate evil

From Psalms

Psalm 97

¹The LORD reigneth; let the earth rejoice;
      let the multitude of isles be glad thereof.

²Clouds and darkness are round about him:
      righteousness and judgment are the habitation of his throne.
³A fire goeth before him,
      and burneth up his enemies round about.
⁴His lightnings enlightened the world:
      the earth saw, and trembled.
⁵The hills melted like wax at the presence of the LORD,
      at the presence of the Lord of the whole earth.
⁶The heavens declare his righteousness,
      and all the people see his glory.

⁷Confounded be all they that serve graven images,
      that boast themselves of idols:
      worship him, all ye gods.

⁸Zion heard, and was glad;
      and the daughters of Judah rejoiced
      because of thy judgments, O LORD.
⁹For thou, LORD, art high above all the earth:
      thou art exalted far above all gods.

¹⁰Ye that love the LORD, hate evil:
      he preserveth the souls of his saints;
      he delivereth them out of the hand of the wicked.
¹¹Light is sown for the righteous,
      and gladness for the upright in heart.
¹²Rejoice in the LORD, ye righteous;
      and give thanks at the remembrance of his holiness.

A boy is invited to go see a movie with some friends that he knows in appropriate and has too much violence.  More than that he knows his mother and father would not permit him to go see the movie.  But more than anything he just wants to be with his friends.  So, when he asks about whether he can go to the movie, he has several choices:

a) He can tell his mom and dad that they are going to see a different, and appropriate, movie.  That way they'll let him go.
b) He can be honest with his mom and dad about the movie choice, and tell them he will step out of the theatre during the violent parts
c) Simply tell his friends that he's sorry, but he can't attend the party.

Psalm 97 verse 10 tells us the answer, or should I say, reinforces the obvious answer of c.  "Ye that love the LORD, hate evil: he preserveth the souls of his saints; he delivereth them out of the hand of the wicked."  This is a simple story about a boy that is easy to work out.  However, everyday we have similar choices - and too often we choose the equivalent to (a) or (b) because it's what our friends are doing.  Or maybe we are not speaking out against evil.  We are silent in order not to make waves afraid that we may lose respect or friendship.

Whatever the case may be we must hate evil - for me that evil is the source of my addiction.  The evil that markets alcohol to minors creating misconceptions of the happiness and fun that alcohol brings.  The evil that de-humanizes women into sex objects creating a separation between love and sex.  For other addicts obviously there are other sources but the evil is there and needs to be addressed.  We need to start with addressing the evil exists in our lives.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 96 (KJV): Sing unto the Lord a new song

From Psalms

Psalm 96

¹O sing unto the LORD a new song:
      sing unto the LORD, all the earth.
²Sing unto the LORD, bless his name;
      shew forth his salvation from day to day.
³Declare his glory among the heathen,
      his wonders among all people.

⁴For the LORD is great, and greatly to be praised:
      he is to be feared above all gods.
⁵For all the gods of the nations are idols:
      but the LORD made the heavens.
⁶Honour and majesty are before him:
      strength and beauty are in his sanctuary.

⁷Give unto the LORD, O ye kindreds of the people,
      give unto the LORD glory and strength.
⁸Give unto the LORD the glory due unto his name:
      bring an offering, and come into his courts.
⁹O worship the LORD in the beauty of holiness:
      fear before him, all the earth.

¹⁰Say among the heathen that the LORD reigneth:
      the world also shall be established that it shall not be moved:
      he shall judge the people righteously.
¹¹Let the heavens rejoice, and let the earth be glad;
      let the sea roar, and the fulness thereof.
¹²Let the field be joyful, and all that is therein:
Then shall all the trees of the wood rejoice
¹³Before the LORD: for he cometh,
      for he cometh to judge the earth:
he shall judge the world with righteousness,
      and the people with his truth.

I have been thinking a lot in the last day or so, about what it means to recover and heal from addiction.  It doesn't just mean stopping that behavior.   It's much more about having a changed heart.  Rewiring your brain and body deal with stress and struggles in a different way.

In that respect, is why I choose to focus on the first verse, "Sing unto the Lord a new song."  In recovery we throw out our old thoughts and replace them with new ones.  We address problems instead of run from them.    No longer are we victims.  Going forward we are strong.  No longer do we lie and cover up.  Going forward we are open and honest.

Let the heavens rejoice - because this is true healing, delivered from God.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 95 (KJV): Today if ye will hear his voice, Harden not your heart...

From Psalms

Psalm 95

¹O come, let us sing unto the LORD:
      let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation.
²Let us come before his presence with thanksgiving,
      and make a joyful noise unto him with psalms.

³For the LORD is a great God,
      and a great King above all gods.
⁴In his hand are the deep places of the earth:
      the strength of the hills is his also.
⁵The sea is his, and he made it:
      and his hands formed the dry land.

⁶O come, let us worship and bow down:
      let us kneel before the LORD our maker.
⁷For he is our God;
      and we are the people of his pasture,
      and the sheep of his hand.

To day if ye will hear his voice,
⁸     Harden not your heart, as in the provocation,
      and as in the day of temptation in the wilderness:
⁹When your fathers tempted me, proved me,
      and saw my work.
¹⁰Forty years long was I grieved with this generation,
      and said, It is a people that do err in their heart,
      and they have not known my ways:
¹¹Unto whom I sware in my wrath
      that they should not enter into my rest.

I'm going through some difficulties today.  Some scenarios that I really struggled to hand over to God.  Somethings that I needed to let go of.  It wasn't easy but with a little prayer I did - and God gave me what I needed.  I learned some things from the experience.  In order to do to turn things over to God you need a few things.  You need some patience.  You need some goodness.  A whole lot of  faithfulness and self control.  All of these things...as natural as they should be, in the situations I was in, were anything but natural.

In many ways they reflect a heart that is open and welcoming of the spirit - the opposite of hard.  Which brings us to verse 8 - harden not your heart.  Trust in the Lord.  Because a trusting, faithful heart, which is full of goodness and patience will be blessed with the other fruits of the spirit: joy, peace, and happiness.

For that we should turn to verse 2: come before the Lord with thanksgiving, and make a joyful noise unto him with psalms - Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 94 (KJV): When I said, My foot slippeth; thy mercy, O Lord, held me up

From Psalms

Psalm 94

¹O Lord God, to whom vengeance belongeth;
      O God, to whom vengeance belongeth, shew thyself.
²Lift up thyself, thou judge of the earth:
      render a reward to the proud.

³LORD, how long shall the wicked,
      how long shall the wicked triumph?

⁴How long shall they utter and speak hard things?
      and all the workers of iniquity boast themselves?
⁵They break in pieces thy people, O LORD,
      and afflict thine heritage.
⁶They slay the widow and the stranger,
      and murder the fatherless.
⁷Yet they say, The LORD shall not see,
      neither shall the God of Jacob regard it.

⁸Understand, ye brutish among the people:
      and ye fools, when will ye be wise?
⁹He that planted the ear, shall he not hear?
      he that formed the eye, shall he not see?
¹⁰He that chastiseth the heathen, shall not he correct?
      he that teacheth man knowledge, shall not he know?
¹¹The LORD knoweth the thoughts of man,
      that they are vanity.

¹²Blessed is the man whom thou chastenest, O LORD,
      and teachest him out of thy law;
¹³That thou mayest give him rest from the days of adversity,
      until the pit be digged for the wicked.
¹⁴For the LORD will not cast off his people,
      neither will he forsake his inheritance.
¹⁵But judgment shall return unto righteousness:
      and all the upright in heart shall follow it.

¹⁶Who will rise up for me against the evildoers?
      or who will stand up for me against the workers of iniquity?
¹⁷Unless the LORD had been my help,
      my soul had almost dwelt in silence.
¹⁸When I said, My foot slippeth;
      thy mercy, O LORD, held me up.
¹⁹In the multitude of my thoughts within me
      thy comforts delight my soul.

²⁰Shall the throne of iniquity have fellowship with thee,
      which frameth mischief by a law?
²¹They gather themselves together against the soul of the righteous,
      and condemn the innocent blood.
²²But the LORD is my defence;
      and my God is the rock of my refuge.
²³And he shall bring upon them their own iniquity,
      and shall cut them off in their own wickedness;
      yea, the LORD our God shall cut them off.

I love analogies and parables.  In this case, verse 18, I said, "My foot slippeth," thy mercy, O Lord, held me.  For me the analogy is a (rookie) rock climber scaling, or leading a 5.8 crag.  For those of you who are not rock climbers picture the rock climber with rope following him up the cliff, and so he would have a little ways (6-8 feet) to fall before the rope caught him.  In any case, as he climbs up...25 feet above the ground, his foot starts to lose its hold.

I know this seems a little dramatic - but for me it's an analogy that works.  Addiction is a slippery slope.  Especially addiction where full abstinence is not an option.  What do I mean by that?  Take drinking for example - you can have full abstinence there.  Your body and mind can and should be able to survive without any alcohol.  What about overeating.  You cannot live with full food abstinence.  You'd starve.  So you have to set-up boundaries.  And that's where the slippery slope comes in.  Same thing for sex.  Sex is an expression of love so we need sex.  So, we set-up boundaries...and in those boundaries sometimes I slip.  I when I say to God, "I am slipping, I need your strength," he is there for me.

One of those boundaries for me is lust.  I constantly slip when it comes to lust.  Just when I think, somehow, that I am alone on this.  God shows me that I am not - in this case, a guy named Greg Donner.  On Greg Donner's website he quotes the Dick Van Dyke show on the boundaries of Marriage, "Marriage, like a lot of other things, has boundaries. And to some guys, those boundaries represent walls, and that makes marriage a prison to them. But to other guys, those boundaries hold everything that's good and fun in life."


This is a great way of looking at boundaries...and another sign that God is with us in this journey and will be there to hold us when our feet slip.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 92 (KJV): It is a good thing to give thanks unto the Lord

From Psalms

Psalm 92
(A psalm.  A song.  For the Sabbath day.)

¹IT IS A GOOD THING TO GIVE THANKS UNTO THE LORD,
      AND TO SING PRAISES UNTO THY NAME, O MOST HIGH:
²To shew forth thy lovingkindness in the morning,
      and thy faithfulness every night,
³Upon an instrument of ten strings, and upon the psaltery;
      upon the harp with a solemn sound.

⁴For thou, LORD, hast made me glad through thy work:
      I will triumph in the works of thy hands.
⁵O LORD, how great are thy works!
      and thy thoughts are very deep.
⁶A brutish man knoweth not;
      neither doth a fool understand this.
⁷When the wicked spring as the grass,
      and when all the workers of iniquity do flourish;
it is that they shall be destroyed for ever:

⁸But thou, LORD, art most high for evermore.

⁹For, lo, thine enemies, O LORD,
      for, lo, thine enemies shall perish;
      all the workers of iniquity shall be scattered.
¹⁰But my horn shalt thou exalt like the horn of an unicorn:
      I shall be anointed with fresh oil.
¹¹Mine eye also shall see my desire on mine enemies,
      and mine ears shall hear my desire of the wicked that rise up against me.

¹²The righteous shall flourish like the palm tree:
      he shall grow like a cedar in Lebanon.
¹³Those that be planted in the house of the LORD
      shall flourish in the courts of our God.
¹⁴They shall still bring forth fruit in old age;
      they shall be fat and flourishing;
¹⁵To shew that the LORD is upright:
      he is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in him.

For I have come to learn what the psalmist says in psalm 92.  It is good to show thanks to the Lord.  It is not just good it is beautiful and sweet.

Thank you Lord for your gifts and your blessings.  Thank you for the fruit of your psalms, which give me strength and help me to live in your word.  I praise you for the day of sobriety that I have ahead of me.  I have people close to me whom I love, and who love me.  It is a sunny day with so much potential.  You make me glad through your work and the path you lay before me.  Help me to hear your word for me today so I can see and follow that path.  In this praise I hope to show you are upright and the power and the glory of your way of life.  You are my rock.

Praise be to God.

Thanks for letting me share.