Psalm 43 (KJV):Why are thou cast down, O my soul?

From Psalms

Psalm 43

¹Judge me, O God,
and plead my cause against
      an ungodly nation:
O deliver me from
      the deceitful and unjust man.
²For thou art the God of my strength:
why dost thou cast me off?
why go I mourning
      because of the oppression of the enemy?

³O send out thy light and thy truth:
      let them lead me;
let them bring me unto thy holy hill,
      and to thy tabernacles.
⁴Then will I go unto the altar of God,
      unto God my exceeding joy:
yea, upon the harp
      will I praise thee,
      O God my God.

⁵Why art thou cast down, O my soul?
and why art thou disquieted within me?
      hope in God:
for I shall yet praise him,
who is the health of my countenance,
      and my God.

Why are thou cast down, O my soul?  and why are thou disquieted within me?  Which has also been translated as, "Why am I discouraged?  Why am I restless?"  It came up yesterday in Psalm 42 and it returns in Psalm 43.  Why is this a constant theme?  Maybe because its not uncommon to have these questions.  Even as Christians.

I mean this is only natural.  Especially when bad things happen to good people.  When, a friend of mine, a mother of three gets breast cancer.  Or another friend loses his job.  The most effective way to handle these situations, and bring true peace into our lives, is to keep God close to us.  It's these situations that God will shine through for us.  He will guide us in what is important, deliver us from evil, help us find joy and peace a midst uncertain circumstances.

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Psalm 42 (KJV): My soul thirsteth for God

From Psalms

Psalm 42
(A special psalm for the people of Korah and the music leader.)

¹As the hart panteth
      after the water brooks,
so panteth my soul
      after thee, O God.
²My soul thirsteth for God,
for the living God:
      when shall I come and appear before God?
³My tears have been my meat
      day and night,
while they continually say unto me,
      Where is thy God?

⁴When I remember these things,
      I pour out my soul in me:
for I had gone with the multitude,
      I went with them to the house of God,
with the voice of joy and praise,
      with a multitude that kept holyday.
⁵Why art thou cast down, O my soul?
and why art thou disquieted in me?
      hope thou in God:
for I shall yet praise him
for the help of his countenance.


⁶O my God, my soul is cast down within me:
      therefore will I remember thee
from the land of Jordan,
and of the Hermonites,
      from the hill Mizar.
⁷Deep calleth unto deep
      at the noise of thy waterspouts:
all thy waves and
      thy billows are gone over me.
⁸Yet the LORD will command
      his lovingkindness in the day time,
and in the night his song shall be with me,
and my prayer unto
      the God of my life.

⁹I will say unto God my rock,
      Why hast thou forgotten me?
why go I mourning
      because of the oppression of the enemy?
¹⁰As with a sword in my bones,
      mine enemies reproach me;
while they say daily unto me,
      Where is thy God?

¹¹Why art thou cast down, O my soul?
and why art thou disquieted within me?
      hope thou in God:
for I shall yet praise him,
who is the health of my countenance,
      and my God.

Oh, it's good to get back reading psalms.  Like a breath of fresh air they calm my soul and give me strength.  Unfortunately, when I got to the end of book 1 I was out of scanned images of my psalms.  So, I had to take several days getting those ready.  Thankfully though that is mostly behind me and I can get back to reading, writing and praying psalms because that's where God guides me and assures me.

There is a lot of things going on in my life, at work and at home.  I need this time to read and meditate and pray to help put things into perspective and remove the worry and anxiety.  Neither worry or anxiety are productive - and both tend to put me in a risky place where my addictive reflexes start to show through in my thoughts.  However, with prayer, and the perspective that comes with it, that worry and anxiety slips away.

It's easy to relate these thoughts to this psalm.  My soul doesn't just thirst right now - it downright aches.  Thankfully I have God, my rock.  Sometimes I ask God, "Why have you forgotten me?"  I realize then, after a week or so without solid prayer - it is I who has forgotten him.  Again, I put my hope and trust in the Lord and am strong, again.  At night his song is with me.  During the day I am blessed with his love.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 41 (KJV):As for me, thou upholdest me, and settest me before thy face for ever

From Psalms

Psalm 41
(For the director of music. A psalm of David.)

¹Blessed is he that considereth the poor:
      the LORD will deliver him in time of trouble.
²The LORD will preserve him, and keep him alive;
      and he shall be blessed upon the earth:
      and thou wilt not deliver him unto the will of his enemies.
³The LORD will strengthen him upon the bed of languishing:
      thou wilt make all his bed in his sickness.

⁴I said, LORD, be merciful unto me:
      heal my soul; for I have sinned against thee.
⁵Mine enemies speak evil of me,
      When shall he die, and his name perish?
⁶And if he come to see me,
      he speaketh vanity: his heart gathereth iniquity to itself;
      when he goeth abroad, he telleth it.

⁷All that hate me whisper together against me:
      against me do they devise my hurt.
⁸An evil disease, say they, cleaveth fast unto him:
      and now that he lieth he shall rise up no more.
⁹Yea, mine own familiar friend, in whom I trusted,
      which did eat of my bread, hath lifted up his heel against me.

¹⁰But thou, O LORD, be merciful unto me,
      and raise me up, that I may requite them.
¹¹By this I know that thou favourest me,
      because mine enemy doth not triumph over me.
¹²And as for me, thou upholdest me in mine integrity,
      and settest me before thy face for ever.

¹³Blessed be the LORD God of Israel
      from everlasting, and to everlasting.
Amen, and Amen.

Milestones are a good thing. They help us mark progress.  I have made many milestones in the short time of this blog.  I have completed step 7.  I have made it to 9 months of sobriety.  And now I have made to the end of book I of Psalms.

It feels like a better day...the clouds of my days seem to be drifting.  The adrenaline that I've been running on is wearing out.  I heard a great song on the radio today, which is a great symbol of that - "In the middle of my little mess I forget how big I'm blessed."  As Psalm 41 says today in verse 11, "By this I know that thou favourest me, because mine enemy doth not triumph over me.  And as for me, thou upholdest me in mine integrity, and settest me before thy face for ever."

Blessed be the Lord, AMEN AND AMEN.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 40:17 (KJV): But I am poor and needy; yet the Lord thinketh upon me

From Psalms

Psalm 40:17

¹⁷But I am poor and needy; yet the Lord thinketh upon me: thou art my help and my deliverer; make no tarrying, O my God.

Have you ever had one of those days where you want to be something - you want to show that you lead and are in control?  However, none of your plans seem to line-up?  Where you think you have all of the information you need to make a decision only to find that you don't?  When somebody you thought you could count on bails - and their behavior reflects more on you than it does on them?

I'm having one of those days - where I wanted so badly for something to go perfectly...and it just is not.  I am trying to do something I did before and failed at.  I'm not sure I really failed at it, but I feel like I failed at before.  Nevertheless, I thought I was ready to try it again.  I have a feeling a may be blowing this out of proportion - the way any good addict does.  I know it's not the end of the world - but I certainly feel like a fool.  I feel like people think I'm insane...and out of control.

In this regard I am needy.  Yet I know the Lord thinketh upon me.  He is my help and deliverer.  Please God just help me through the next few days and let me come out relatively unscathed - deliver and help me.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 40:1-16 (KJV): The Lord heard my cry, brought me up out of an horrible pit

From Psalms

Psalm 40:1-16
(For the director of music. Of David. A Psalm.)

¹I waited patiently for the LORD;
      and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry.
²He brought me up also out of an horrible pit,
      out of the miry clay,
and set my feet upon a rock,
      and established my goings.
³And he hath put a new song in my mouth,
      even praise unto our God:
many shall see it, and fear,
      and shall trust in the LORD.

⁴Blessed is that man
      that maketh the LORD his trust,
and respecteth not the proud,
      nor such as turn aside to lies.
⁵Many, O LORD my God,
      are thy wonderful works which thou hast done,
and thy thoughts which are to us-ward:
      they cannot be reckoned up in order unto thee:
if I would declare and speak of them,
      they are more than can be numbered.

⁶Sacrifice and offering thou didst not desire;
      mine ears hast thou opened:
burnt offering and sin offering
      hast thou not required.
⁷Then said I, Lo, I come:
      in the volume of the book it is written of me,
⁸I delight to do thy will, O my God:
      yea, thy law is within my heart.

⁹I have preached righteousness in the great congregation:
      lo, I have not refrained my lips,
      O LORD, thou knowest.
¹⁰I have not hid thy righteousness within my heart;
      I have declared thy faithfulness and thy salvation:
I have not concealed thy lovingkindness and thy truth
      from the great congregation.

¹¹Withhold not thou thy tender mercies from me, O LORD:
      let thy lovingkindness and thy truth continually preserve me.
¹²For innumerable evils have compassed me about:
      mine iniquities have taken hold upon me, so that I am not able to look up;
they are more than the hairs of mine head:
      therefore my heart faileth me.

¹³Be pleased, O LORD, to deliver me:
      O LORD, make haste to help me.
¹⁴Let them be ashamed and confounded together
      that seek after my soul to destroy it;
let them be driven backward and put to shame
      that wish me evil.
¹⁵Let them be desolate for a reward of their shame
      that say unto me, Aha, aha.
¹⁶Let all those that seek thee
      rejoice and be glad in thee:
let such as love thy salvation say continually,
      The LORD be magnified.

Working all 12 steps and going through all 150 psalms is a long time - and it seems I am barely halfway through.  However, through both of these I have been patient and diligent.  In my patience God has seen fit to pull me out of my pit of addiction (see Psalm 7).

Although I may go through periods of stress or uncertainty where part of me is looking to turn to my addictions I know I can always turn to the Lord.  Even in days when the stress and uncertainty doesn't turn me to my addiction I now turn to the Lord.  Like today I need help with my marriage - things are incredibly tense between me and my wife right now.  Despite all that I am not feeling a need right now to turn to my addiction.  I am able to share it with my Lord and he is starting to present other options in my life.

Then to move on to verse three.  Quite literally, as I make my journey through recovery, I find that the Lord has put a new song in my heart.  I now find my self listening to Christian radio stations.  This is something that I never used to do.  However, I find that they help bridge that gap between Sundays and put the rest of my life.  Some days, in fact, I'm not sure what I would do without them.

Thanks for letting me share.