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| From Psalms |
Psalm 31
(For the director of music. A psalm of David.)
1In thee, O LORD, do I put my trust;
let me never be ashamed:
deliver me in thy righteousness.
2Bow down thine ear to me;
deliver me speedily:
be thou my strong rock,
for an house of defence to save me.
3For thou art my rock and my fortress;
therefore for thy name's sake lead me, and guide me.
4Pull me out of the net that they have laid privily for me:
for thou art my strength.
5Into thine hand I commit my spirit:
thou hast redeemed me, O LORD God of truth.
6I have hated them that regard lying vanities:
but I trust in the LORD.
7I will be glad and rejoice in thy mercy:
for thou hast considered my trouble;
thou hast known my soul in adversities;
8And hast not shut me up into the hand of the enemy:
thou hast set my feet in a large room.
9Have mercy upon me, O LORD, for I am in trouble:
mine eye is consumed with grief,
yea, my soul and my belly.
10For my life is spent with grief,
and my years with sighing:
my strength faileth because of mine iniquity,
and my bones are consumed.
11I was a reproach among all mine enemies,
but especially among my neighbours,
and a fear to mine acquaintance:
they that did see me without fled from me.
12I am forgotten as a dead man out of mind:
I am like a broken vessel.
13For I have heard the slander of many:
fear was on every side:
while they took counsel together against me,
they devised to take away my life.
14But I trusted in thee, O LORD:
I said, Thou art my God.
15My times are in thy hand:
deliver me from the hand of mine enemies,
and from them that persecute me.
16Make thy face to shine upon thy servant:
save me for thy mercies' sake.
17Let me not be ashamed, O LORD;
for I have called upon thee:
let the wicked be ashamed,
and let them be silent in the grave.
18Let the lying lips be put to silence;
which speak grievous things proudly
and contemptuously against the righteous.
19Oh how great is thy goodness,
which thou hast laid up for them that fear thee;
which thou hast wrought for them that trust in thee
before the sons of men!
20Thou shalt hide them in the secret of thy presence
from the pride of man:
thou shalt keep them secretly in a pavilion
from the strife of tongues.
Why are the (12) steps so hard? I look around the meetings I attend and very few have made it as far in the steps that I have with similar lengths of sobriety. Although I am making much progress I still struggle. Of course, no solid recovery can come without work and struggle, I know. However, Step 8 should not be as difficult as I'm making it. I know the people I have hurt by my addiction. Yet I can't complete the list. In fact, I am having trouble getting past the first person. I fear that if my steps stagnate that I will become complacent and lose my sobriety - get into a situation where I lose control, again.
Lord, I am in trouble; my strength fails because of my iniquity/affliction; I was the slander of many and fear was on every side. Ah, but I trust in you Lord; My times are in your hand; deliver me from evil, from the hand of my enemies, and my addiction; Make your face shine upon me for your mercies' sake. Let me not be ashamed for calling upon you. Oh how great is your goodness.
Thanks for letting me share.
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