Psalm 21:13 (MSG) Show your strength, God, so no one can miss it

Psalm 21:13 (The Message)
A David Psalm

¹³Show your strength, GOD, so no one can miss it.
      We are out singing the good news!

God is great.  God was the only thing powerful enough to stop me from my addictions.  To me, Psalm 21 is about His greatness.  The great life he planned, and gave, to David.  Now I'm not the kind of person who compares his himself to great people - in fact, I kind of hate it when people consider themselves to be great like that.  However, as I read psalm 21, I feel like God has piled blessings on me, in the same way he piled blessings on David.

At one point in my life, I was so close to losing everything.  Now I have more than I could have dreamed. I wanted a good life and God gave it to me.  He's filled my arms with gifts, and delivered me from my addiction.  So, it should be no surprise that I would want to share this kind of power with the world.  That it would be my hope that this power, which can liberate all people from evil, reign over the world.  This shall be my song today.

Dear Lord, be with us today, as we sing your good news.  As we bear witness to your power over evil.  As we bear witness to your glory and your way of life.  There are so many people who suffer from the prison of addiction, Lord.  Relieve of us of our bondage of self that we may help those addicts who still suffer.  In helping the addicts that suffer, help us play our role in liberating them from evil.  Let us help in a way that those addicts who still suffer can experience arms filled with gifts and a good life.  All this we pray in your name, Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 20:6 (MSG) An answer's on the way

Psalm 20:6 (The Message)
A David Psalm

⁶That clinches it - help's coming
      an answer's on the way,
      everything's going to work out.

There are days, and some situations, when faith and hope are hard to come by.  On those days it is hard to believe that everything that everything is going to work out.  We all have those days.  and they test our faith.  Recently, I have been able to listen to sermon radio.  One pastor, in particular (I won't name him) says that faith is about expecting positive things in your life.  Expecting that everything will work out.  He believes that if you have this expectation it will happen.  If you don't, he continues, you bring about a negativity that allows things to go wrong.  So, in that way, faith is about maintaining high expectations in the face of bad days and disappointment.

Let's be clear, I don't believe that you can will things to happen just by having a positive attitude.  Some things are just not part of God's will - as much as we'd like to believe they are.  So, our will or expectation will not have much influence in those areas.  However, I do believe the things we think impact the paths some things take.  For example, if we think people are generally good, then we will find the good in people.  If you give people a chance most people will rise to the occasion.  If you have faith that all problems can be solved, and you are patient, as well as persistent, problems will be solved.  On the flip side of that, I also believe, like Dale Carnegie, that worrying doesn't help anything, and the perfect way to conquer worry is to pray.  If you can pray, well, like Psalm 20, verse 6, says, "An answer's on the way."

Dear Lord, we know there are always days that seem like nothing can go right.  Like the world is ending.  Like there are no answers.  Show us that, in fact, help is coming.  Help us to conquer our worrying.  Show us that an answer's on the way - even if it's not the easy answer we were hoping for.  Remind us that our addiction is not the answer and won't make our problems go away.  Every now and then we all need this kind of hope.  Teach us that your plan is that everything works for good.  Then when tables are turned and we have the opportunity to share your light to someone who needs help or an answer - let us be that light.  Let us be that person who provides Your love, who provides Your answer, who helps everything work out.  In the name of Jesus, and our savior, Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 19:11-13 (MSG) Keep me from my stupid sins

Psalm 19:1-2
A David Psalm

^11-13There’s more: God’s Word warns us of danger
      and directs us to hidden treasure.
Otherwise how will we find our way?
      Or know when we play the fool?
Clean the slate, God, so we can start the day fresh!
      Keep me from stupid sins,
      from thinking I can take over your work;
Then I can start this day sun-washed,
      scrubbed clean of the grime of sin.

I have a confession to make.  I can hold a grudge.  Sometimes, it is very difficult for me to forgive.  In those situations where I find it hard to forgive I also forget to reach out to God for help.  This all came to light for me this week when I was finally able to forgive somebody at work, let's call him Andy.  For the past several months Andy had been lying, saying nasty things about my work, and saying different things in different situations.  To me he'd say one thing and to a peer he'd say the opposite.  It became very difficult to trust Andy and to be completely honest, when I thought about the things he did, I called him the devil.  One of my co-workers, who is a much better person than I, confronted Andy about his actions to understand his motivation.  He began to understand a little better what was at play.  For me though, I avoided Andy, ignored him, and talked with others behind his back.  It wasn't until this week, when I found out that Andy had decided to leave the company, that I was able to forgive him.  It was such a relief - but I believe it is something I should have been able to do earlier, had I been able to ask God for help.

Lord, I am very capable of stupid sins.  The bible is full of warnings, yet I forget and ignore those warnings.  You guide us to the true treasures in life.  Instead, in my stupidity I chase the treasures of men, and find myself focused on filling my retirement investment fund.  Thankfully, at least once a week, you help me see the err of my ways.  You give me many chances, to learn and change the way I act and improve the decisions that I make.  For this I am grateful - and I praise you.  Continue, God, to keep me from my stupid, selfish, sins.  Help me make amends for the sins that I have committed in the past.  Help me wipe the slate clean so that I can start this day, and every day, as a fresh start - with my record scrubbed clean of the grime of sin. AMEN.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 18:1-2 (MSG) I love you God - You make me strong

Psalm 18:1-2 (The Message)
A David Song - after he was saved from his enemies and Saul.

^1-2I love you, GOD -
    you make me strong.
GOD is bedrock under my feet,
    the castle in which I live,
    my rescuing knight.
My God - the high crag
    where I run for dear life,
    hiding behind the boulders,
    safe in the granite hideout.

This week has been a good week.  One where I feel organized and "productive."  I feel strong.  This by itself is not extraordinary, what makes it unique is the hard drive on my laptop died.  In the past, this would have killed me (figuratively of course).  I would have fallen apart and blamed everything wrong in my life on the hard drive failing.  No doubt, it would have triggered me into my addiction.  Now some of the data was backed-up - and I am most happy about the pictures of my family that I retrieved from the back-up.  However, there is a good year or so of work that was lost when the drive failed.

However, with God I am stronger.  I know in the grand scheme of His plans, the data that was lost was not really significant.  I also know that there was nothing lost that can't be found elsewhere if it's truly critical.  With these thoughts I am able to let go of my worries and concerns of the lost data.  That is just part of the way I am stronger today than 5 years ago, when I started this journey.

God, thank you for making us stronger.  Thank you for blessing us as the castle's in which we live.  Thank you for being a granite hideout for us to run to.  You bring us not only strength but hope.  For all this, we love You.  Help me reflect that and let me bring the same hope and strength to others, that you have brought to me.  Especially to the addicts that still suffer and are in desperate need of hope and strength - help me be a light and a source of strength for them. All these things we pray, and praise, in your name, Hallelujah, and Amen.

Psalm 17:8-9 (MSG) Keep your eye on me

Psalm 17:8-9 (The Message)
A David Prayer

^8-9Keep your eye on me;
      hide me under your cool wing feathers
From the wicked who are out to get me,
      from mortal enemies closing in.

It's funny, as I continue on my way through psalms I am really drawn to verses like these.  I wrote this draft weeks, ago, and without really thinking about it, but this post is very similar to my last one in that it's about God's protection.  It's very coincidental but I guess that's what I'm looking for the most.  I've never really felt about how much fear plays a role in my life - but if I'm constantly drawn to God's protection fear must be pretty important.

When I think about it, fear and insecurity leads to so many bad things.  How many things do we do because we're afraid or insecure.  When I'm afraid of losing my "stuff" I put walls and locks.  Or worse I take proactive steps and I start attacking people who I perceive are a threat.  I start to analyze people to determine if they're a threat or not.  This leads to a vicious cycle where my distrust leads to another person's distrust of me - and in a worst case, we end up competing to be the first destroy the other.  What ends up happening is that our fear and insecurity ends up leading us to very situation we fear in the first place.

God, we often find ourselves in situations where we are unsure.  We are afraid.  It might be a situation where we are confronted with new ideas.  Initially, these ideas may seem to threaten our very beliefs and values.  In the face of these new ideas, help us be secure and have faith in You and Your word.  In these situations, help us seek to understand, not to be understood, that we might be an instrument of thy peace.  For we understand that is only a strong faith can we seek to sow love where there is hate...instead of perpetuating more hate.  There are many addicts, who still suffer, who are afraid and insecure.  They have put up walls around them and usually suffer in isolation.  Help them find security in you that they may bring down those walls.  Guide them to a faith that allows them to stop hiding behind their addiction.  To a faith that gives them a new life in Your word and Your way of life.  A new life, of Your path, where in forgiving, we are forgiven.  All this we pray in Your sons name, and our savior, Jesus - Amen.

Thanks so much for letting me share.

Psalm 16:1-2 (MSG) Keep me safe, O God

Psalm 16:4 (The Message)

A David Song

^1-2Keep me safe, O God,
      I've run for dear life to you.
I say to GOD, "Be my Lord!"
      Without you nothing makes sense.

I have long sat on Psalm 16, trying to decide what I want to write about.  There are many important values and ideas here.  Whether verse 4, not to shop for Gods, not to treat God like a brand, which I interpret to be wear God on your heart before you wear him on your clothes.  Or verse 9-11, where the psalmist writes about his happiness in all perspectives and He has set me on His path for me.  It's kind of like having to choose which commandment is the most important.

ultimately, for me, in Psalm 16, it came down to God protects us from verses 1 and 2.  There are so many things that threaten us.  War, violence, and crime threaten our safety.  Disease, pollution, and parasites threaten our health.  Of course, there is also addiction, which threatens our health, relationships, finances, and safety.  As amazingly as we are designed, with our ability to adapt and heal, we are still incredibly exposed to risk.  The natural response to these threats is to hide ourselves from these threats and shield ourselves.  The appropriate response I believe though is to show faith in God and trust that He will protect us.  For if God is with us, who will be against us, and whom then shall we fear?

Dear Lord, be with us, continue to be with us, and protect us.  Lead us down the path you have laid out for us and steer us straight when we go astray.  Deliver us from the threats in our lives, from the parasites, from the disease, and from the addiction.  In the face of war and crime let us be a light that brings hope and truth.  Give us this day, sustenance that we may be strong in the face of these threats and can be Your light.  Guide us to forgive those people who have threatened us in the past.  For we understand that it is in forgiving, that we will be forgiven.  And that it is in dying we are given Your ultimate gift of eternal life.  All these things I pray in Your name, AMEN.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 15:5 (MSG) Keep your word even when it costs you

Psalm 15:5  (The Message)
A David Psalm

5"Keep your word even when it costs you,
make an honest living
      never take a bribe.

"You'll never get
blacklisted
if you live like this."

This Psalm lists several important do's and don'ts - but of this list, I specifically chose the set of do's out of the list for a couple of reasons.  The first is that it is impossible to live by don'ts.  The only way to be successful at don't is to focus on do's.  The second reason is that lying becomes a significant part of the problem(s) in the life of an addict that suffers.

At first, a lie seems easy.  "It won't hurt anybody," we think.  It's just a white lie - or sometimes it's just an omission.  "What they don't know won't hurt them," we tell ourselves.  The lies certainly seem easier than the alternative of getting caught doing something wrong.  Eventually though all the lies, cover ups and hiding grows until it becomes impossible to keep consistent.  It's quite literally a hell that becomes unbearable.  Then we start our recovery and we see all those lies aren't necessary.  We don't have to be perfect.  We don't have to worry about how people perceive us along as we're authentic to ourselves.  There it is it, eventually it becomes obvious that the person who suffered the most of all at the hands of our lies were ourselves.  So once we could shed the lies we could become the person God intended us to be.

Dear Lord, I am grateful.  Grateful for your truth.  Grateful for the plan you have for me.  Most of all I am grateful that you keep your word.  Be with those who are still suffering from an addiction.  The ones who are buried in their own lies.  Show them there is a better way.  A way, in your word, where the lies are not necessary.  A way, where it will be easier for them to keep their word.  A way, where they can be happier and have greater peace.  Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 14:4 (MSG) Treating people like a fast food meal

Psalm 14:4 (The Message)
A David Psalm

⁴Don't they know anything,
      all of these impostors?
Don't they know
      they can't get away with this -
Treating people like a fast food meal
      over which they are too busy to pray?

I struggled with this psalm today.  After going through several of the verses I finally decided on verse 4 as having the most meaning to my recovery.  In particular, for line about eating up "people like a fast food meal."  Our society teaches us we can treat people like objects or statistics.  People have become target markets, eyes on a website, and demographics of liberals and conservatives part of red and blue states.  So, it should not come as a surprise when we feel like we are objectified.  This, to me, is one of the saddest things of what our society has come to.

We've lost the stories of the people.  Everyone of us has a story, which is comprised of many many smaller stories.  These stories are God's plan for us and every one of them is unique and important.  Some are tales of adventure while others are stories of persistence and perseverance.  Yet, we disregard those of others while we try to make our own seem more important.  We have to stop this, stop treating people like fast food meals.  We need to listen to other people's stories and treat them with the dignity they deserve, as another one of God's children.  For it will require that we start doing this, ourselves, can we expect that others will do it as well.  Only then will we start to see a difference in the way society views people - not as statistics but as individual children of God.

Dear Lord, be with us today as we do more to value our brothers and sisters.  Help us to make time and put away our distractions so we can focus on their stories.  For we know that hearing these stories will bring understanding.  Understanding then creates bonds of respect and friendship.  This respect and these friendships are part of your light - and through your light we will have peace.  This message of peace, after all, is the message Jesus that we celebrate every year at Christmas.  Help us spread and celebrate this message of peace, by sharing stories, especially now in this time of lent.  Through this let us, at the same time, experience your peace and bring your peace to others.  For you have taught us that it is only in giving that we shall receive.  All this we pray in your name.  Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 13:3 (MSG) I want to look life in the eye

Psalm 13:3  (The Message)
A David Psalm

³Take a good look at me, GOD, my God;
      I want to look life in the eye

It takes courage to look life in the eye.  Often courage that I'm not sure that I have.  Courage to take risks.  Courage to take responsibility.  Courage to be honest to tell people things they don't want to hear.  Sometimes I think if I only could have more courage my recovery would be easier.  I guess that's true, part of the journey of recovery is becoming stronger, and finding courage in situations where hid before.  So today I will pray that my recovery will help me find the courage that I need.

Dear Lord be with us give us the courage and strength we need to successful in our recovery.  The change we face in recovery is hard.  There are times when I am ready to sleep but I know I need to be strong to face the challenge of the situation.  Be with me at that time that I may look life in the eye and face the challenge.  There are times when I am in distress and my mind is racing.  Be with me at that time to calm my mind and bring me peace, that I may look life in the eye.  I pray that you will do this for all my brothers and sisters in recovery.  Whether they are just starting the journey of recovery or 10 years into the recovery, we all need your support.  All this we pray in your name, Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 12:6-8 (MSG) God, keep us safe from their lies

Psalm 12:6-8 (The Message)
A David Psalm

^6-8God's words are pure words,

Pure silver words refined seven times
In the fires of his word-kiln,
Pure on earth as well as is in heaven.
GOD, keep us safe from their lies,
From the wicked who stalk us with lies,
From the wicked who collect honors
For their wonderful lies.

We are bombarded with images about what our lives should look like.  Bombarded with advertisements about all of the things we should have.  Bombarded with images about what success should look like.  An example of these images, is how alcohol ads show drinking beer is an essential thing that you must do with friends - implying that drinking alcohol is the way to guarantee a good time.  We all know the implied and promised messages in ads aren't true.  We all know that none of those things bring true happiness.  We all know it's all lies.

Yet, somehow we get sucked in to hype.  Eventually, progressively chasing these things turns into a habit, then into something that's mandatory, and finally we lose control.  Whether it's from gambling, drinking, sex addiction, or shopping addiction.  The stories are all the very similar.  Somehow, the ads never show the problems that come from addiction - just the bliss.  The ads and images never show the bankruptcies, the lost relationships, or the broken careers.

That's why it's so important to follow and believe in the words of God.  They are pure.  God's promises are not about worldly wealth or success.  His idea of an abundant life is where we thrive with blessing that can't be measured, in love, in happiness.  His word and His promises see through the lies of the companies and people, who benefit from our addictions and our downfall.  The companies care only about their own success and profitability.  They don't care about addiction or the ruin that addiction creates.  They stalk us looking for ways to keep us "loyal" - adding more alcohol, sugar, or caffeine making their products more addictive.  But God, and his word, is pure.  We will be safe if we follow His word.

Dear God, thank you for your word.  Continue to keep us safe from the wicked who bombard and stalk us with lies.  Help us see through the lies, and that happiness does not come from having or consuming a particular product.  Help us, rather, see that happiness comes from living in your word.  Continue to remind us that it is in giving that will shall receive.  Let us not forget that it is in our forgiveness that we will be forgiven, and that it is in dying that we are born again to eternal life.  All this we pray in your name, Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 11:7 (MSG) God loves getting lines straight

Psalm 11:7  (The Message)
A David Psalm

⁷God's business is putting things right;

      he loves getting the lines straight,
Setting us straight.  Once we're standing tall,
      we can look him straight in the eye.

Discipline is a difficult thing.  It's hard to hear you're not doing something right.  It's hard to get up every morning and exercise.  It's hard make to sacrifices during lent.  It's hard to go through every psalm.  It's hard to avoid addiction everyday when your brain tells you you're going to explode without the next shot of dopamine.  All of this, though, helps to get things straight - and getting things straight is God's business.

Looking for inspiration, I googled, "God loves getting things straight" and I found this quote from C.S. Lewis from Mere Christianity, which I think captures the challenge with the change that God is bringing in our lives as he straightens things up:

“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.”

Dear God, help me to straighten up.  Give me courage as embark on this journey of change and prepare me the difficulties of those transitions.  I want to become that palace where you will come to live.  Help set me straight so that I can stand straight and look you in the eye.   Help me prepare for the journey you have in store for me.  Help me understand the changes you are making in my life.  Help me understand the parts of my life that I need to let go of.  So, that I may help you build the house in which you want to live.  For all this pray in your name, Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 10:14 (MSG) But you know all about it...You won't let them down

Psalm 10:14 (The Message)

¹⁴But you know all about it-
      the contempt, the abuse.
I dare to believe that the luckless
      will get lucky someday in you.
You won't let them down:
      orphans won't be orphans forever.

There will be days that we feel like God has deserted us.  Things will go wrong.  We will experience pain.  We all have those days.  It is in those days that we are tested.  It will be tempting to quench the sting of our pain with our addiction.  It will be important though that we maintain our faith in our higher power, in God.

Maintaining faith in the face of pain or disappointment is one of the hardest things to learn.  For me, it's about remembering past experiences where things have turned around.  When things have gone from unsalvageable to being truly good.  Sometimes those turnarounds are slow, and sometimes they seem immediate.  Often the change comes in situations where I least expect it.  So, I've learned to look at all of my options.  I try not to be surprised when the turn-around happens.  Although, I still seem to be surprised when it does happen.

Dear Lord, thank you for blessings.  Thank you for making the luckless lucky.  Thank you for giving families to the orphans.  Thank you for turning lives and situations around.  Help us to maintain our faith and positive attitude in the face of disappointment, loss, and pain.  Keep hope alive in us at all times as a demonstration of our faith in You.  Let us hold your light in times of darkness.  Where there is doubt, let us sow faith.  Where there is despair, let us be able to bring hope.  Grant that I not so much seek to be understood as to understand.  For it is in giving that we shall receive, and in forgiving that we are forgiven.  All this I pray in the name of Your son, and my savior Jesus Christ, Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 9:13-14 (MSG) I'll write the book on hallelujahs

Psalm 9:13-14 (The Message)
A David Psalm

Be kind to me, GOD;
     I've been kicked around long enough.
Once you've pulled me back
    from the gates of death,
I'll write the book on hallelujahs;
    on the corner of Main and First
    I'll hold a street meeting;
I'll be the song leader; we'll fill the air
    with salvation songs.

This section of psalm 9 is what covenants are written on.  How many times have we been at the end of our rope like this.  "God, I'm about to lose everything."  "God, my life is out of control."  "God, please, if I have another night like last night I know it will be my last on earth."  Then we tell him, "If You can fix it I will do anything for you."  Then once he does...well...we say, "Did I say anything?"  Then...we don't step up to our end of the deal.  We fall short on doing anything.  Sure, we do some things better, but we don't do anything.  We don't hold street meetings.  We don't write the book on hallelujahs.  We don't fill the air with salvation songs.

Today that changes.  Today, I stop forgetting the role God plays in my life.  Today, with no imminent crisis, I keep my covenant with God to put him first.  I fill the air with salvation songs.  I will love people the way Jesus to love.  I become the light in the world that He intends me to be.  I will make reparations to those I have hurt.

God, many times I have failed to hold up my end of our bargain.  Many times I have fallen short in our covenant.  Nevertheless, you continue to shower me with your grace and your blessings.  For all of those gifts, and that forgiveness, I am grateful.  Today I will make your will my priority.  For this God, I will need you to fill me with courage - courage to put you before others in my life.  For this I will need you to fill me with patience - patience to wait on you, Lord.  Most of all, Lord, I will need you to fill me with faith - faith that your will, and no other way, is the ultimate path for my life.  I think of the challenges and opportunities you have put before me and I will need these three things to be honest and true to our deal.  Thank you, Lord, for your protection and your guidance.  All this I pray in your name, Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 8:5-6 (MSG) Yet we've so narrowly missed being gods

Psalm 8:5-6
A David Psalm

^5-6Yet we've so narrowly missed being gods,

     bright with Eden's dawn light.
You put us in charge of your handcrafted world,
     repeated to us your Genesis-charge

Recovery is about a lot of things.  It is about change.  Changing our focus from what feels good to what feels right.  The focus also changes from ourselves to things much larger than ourselves.  In that regards the theme of Psalm 8 is very similar.  Psalm 8 describes how God's handiwork drowns out the evil of the world - if we allow it.  If we can take moment step back long enough to see it.

This shift in focus in recovery is also about taking responsibility.  Taking the responsibility that God intended for us.  Psalm 8 discusses this "Genesis-charge" that we are to take care of his handi-work and do His work on earth.  We need to put down our insignificant, and sometimes selfish habits, and replace them with what God intended for us.

As I look at the worries and issues that seem overwhelming in my life from a broader perspective grand scheme of what's important in the world - my worries are fairly insignificant.  I need to keep perspective on what is important to God.  I need to make sure my priorities are aligned with God's priorities.  Is the work I'm doing, and the work I am making my priority really making sure that His handiwork and His word is sustained?  The honest answer is clearly no.

Dear Lord, thank you for the Psalms, that they help us pray and keep us in an honest and strong relationship with you.  Help us keep perspective on our lives and our role that you have planned for us in the world.  Guide us and allow us to take advantage of the opportunities to do your work on earth.  As Psalm 8 so aptly describes you have given us the beauty of creation.  Help us to enjoy, conserve, and protect the beauty of your creation, without polluting, wasting, or misusing these precious gifts.  We want to be in charge of your handcrafted world, help us make your priorities our priorities.  Help us have the courage and perspective of the leaders before us that have brought about the change needed to protect and conserve the gifts you've given us.  All this we pray in your name, Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 7:9 (MSG) Close the book on Evil, God

Psalm 7:9 (The Message)
A David Psalm 

Close the book on Evil, GOD,
     but publish your mandate for us.
You get us ready for life:
     you probe our soft spots,
     you knock off our rough edges.

This was one of the harder psalms for me to decide on how to approach. The main theme to Psalm 7 is that David is an innocent man - he did not rebel against God or treat others unfairly. Whereas I, in my addictions, did rebel against God and treated others unfairly.  So, I am not innocent.  Nevertheless, I see what I've done is wrong.  I want to change my ways.  I want to close the book on evil.

Like David, though, I need God to rise and protect me from my enemies, to close the book on evil.  However, unlike David I am guilty so I need God to forgive me before he can do that.  In order for that to happen, according to the Lord's Prayer, I need to forgive people who have done me wrong.  On paper that seems like a fair trade.  On paper that seems easy.  That is, until I think about some of the people that have done me wrong.  But I do want God to close the book on evil.  So, today I will focus on that forgiveness.

Dear God, thank you for giving us today.  A day where we can focus on your plan in our lives.  A day where we can focus on being a reflection of you, and practice love and forgiveness.  Be with me as I work on this forgiveness.  Help me to let go of my pain and understand the other person's situation.  Help me to understand my role in the situation that lead to the wrong doing.  All these things will be hard for me so ask you help me as I struggle through them.  In doing this help us all to close the book on evil.  Especially, the addicts that still suffer.  Be with them as they try to put the cap on their bottles forever.  Be with them as they try to close the book on their destructive compulsions.  Lead them to a meeting to show them that there is a solution to their problems.  Show them there is road to recovery, restoration, and forgiveness.  For all this we pray, in Jesus's name.       AMEN.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 6:2-3 (MSG): God, how long will it take?

Psalm 6:2-3 (The Message)
A David Psalm

^2-3Can't you see I'm black-and-blue,

     beat up badly in bones and soul?
GOD, how long will it take
     for you to let up?

There is no doubt that life can beat us down,  This past week has been challenging for me - and on at least one occasion the urge to turn to addiction presented itself as an option.  In those situations, like David I ask, "How long will this go on?"  The answer that comes back is, "As long as it takes."  For me, it went on until I cried out to God for it to stop.

I can carry a Bible around, but until I actually use it nothing will change.  I can have the best intentions of visiting an AA meeting but until I go nothing will change.  I have to want it, I have to be prepared to take that step before God will meet me.

Our addiction took several years to progressively get to the place it is today.  So, we have to expect that it will take at least that many years of praying and working the steps to unwind that chaos, insanity and destruction.  Thankfully, when we do take those actions, when we pray and work the steps, God responds and answers our prayers.  Thankfully, this week when temptation presented itself God responded to my prayers - and I was able to maintain my sobriety.

Dear God, thank you for your blessings and answering our prayers.  As we go into the world today continue to be with us and help us unwind the chaos, insanity, and destruction, which our addition(s) brought into our lives.  Help us be a tool of your peace.  Where there is chaos, let us sow your plan.  Where there is insanity, let us sow balance and truth.    Where there is destruction, let us sow restoration.  Grant that we may not so much seek to be understood as to understand; to be loved, as to love; For it is in giving that we receive; it is in forgiving that we are forgiven, and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.  All this we pray in your name, and our savior, Jesus Christ.  AMEN.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 5:1-3 (MSG) Every morning you'll hear me at it again

Psalm 5:1-3 (The Message)
A David Psalm

^1-3Listen, GOD! Please, pay attention!
Can you make sense of these ramblings,
my groans and cries?
     King-God, I need your help.
Every Morning
     you'll hear me at it again.
Every Morning
     I lay out the pieces of my life
     on your altar
     and watch for fire to descend.

Can you make sense of these ramblings, my groans and cries?  Although I plan on these blog entries sometimes the words don't come initially.  Sometimes, after sitting and giving thoughts to the words of Psalms I start typing the first things that come to my mind.  I ramble.  Then when I look at the words I wonder, myself, what I meant.  Then I go back to the psalm and focus, focus on what I think God wants me to take from these prayers.  So, I wonder if the "Please, pay attention," of Psalm 5 is for God or for the person praying.

I realize from that process that praying requires a focus on God.  Somethings in life can become automatic.  You get into a habit it comes naturally, then you can do those things without thinking.  I don't believe that's true for prayer.  I believe prayer takes your focused energy and thought.  So, in times when I'm not sure that God is hearing my prayers, or can't make sense of my ramblings, I ask myself where are my thoughts?  Even though He'll hear me every morning, am I focused on this prayer?  If not then why not?  Have I drifted from God?  If I drifted then who moved?

Dear Lord, hear me, again, as you do every morning.  Be with me today, and help me to focus on your message.  Lay out your plans for me, as I lay out the pieces of my life on your altar.  Help me be attentive and let me not drift away from you so that I can make courageous choices.  Help me, especially during this time of Lent, to say no to worldliness.  Help me say no to idols, especially those idols that become the focus of addiction, like caffeine, alcohol, shopping, gambling, tobacco, and of course sex and pornography.  Help me instead to focus on you, your word, and the plan you have for me.  I pray this in the name of your son, Jesus - Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 4:6-7 (MSG): Why is everyone hungry for more?

Psalm 4:6-7 (The Message)

A David Psalm

^6-7Why is everyone hungry for more? "More, more," they say.
"More, more."
I have God's more-than-enough,
More joy in one ordinary day

It amazes me that this message comes from Psalms - that the idea that we need more than what we have to be happy is not new.  That the idea of having more or newer "stuff" will make me happier is as old as the bible itself.  We all know this idea is completely false - we all know that the the desire for more and newer stuff only leads to a temporary happiness.  Once that temporary happiness leaves us we're just left with a need to have even more and newer stuff.

As renters we think, our life will be different once we own a house.  Then when we own a house we see its imperfections.  Maybe that first house was too small, or on a busy and unsafe street.  So, we move to a new house - until we see what our friends have - and get one with a view, of the ocean or the mountains.  There are hundreds of scenarios that play out something like this.  All the while we miss the blessings that God has given us in the place where we are living.

For me, Lent, as a time of sacrifice, is a time to get perspective.  A time to realize that all lives will have imperfections some kind of lacking.  Maybe I don't have a great house, or a flashy car, or the latest smart phone, or the title I've been chasing at work.  There are a lot of things I don't have.  Lent for me is a time to remember that you need none of those things.  A time to realize that the God has already given me the important things in my life: the love of my church family, the peace of knowing there's a plan for me, and the list goes on.  It's during this time that I realize that I have more Joy in an ordinary Christ-filled day than any more stuff could bring.

Dear God, thank you for your blessings.  Thank you for your love, and the love you bring into our lives.  Thank you for your miracles of healing and peace of recovery.  Continue to show us that we don't need "more."  Help us share the message that idea that "more" or that any "stuff" will bring happiness is a trap.  A trap that snares addicts, because the idea of "more" is the progressive disease that makes addiction possible.  God, help the addict that still suffers understand that "more" is not the solution - that "more" is "more" trouble.  God, help the addict that still suffers understand that You are the solution - not "more."  Thank you for Psalm 4 verse 6 and 7 that it can remind us of what you have in store for us.  All this we pray in Your name - Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 3:3-4 (MSG): His answers thunder from the holy mountain

Psalm 3:3-4 (The Message)

A David Psalm, When He Escaped for His Life from Absalom, His Son

^3-4But you, GOD shield me on all sides;
You ground my feet, you lift my head high;
With all my might I shout up to GOD,
His answers thunder from the holy mountain.

When I see this, I see David demonstrating steps 2 and 3 of the 12 steps.

Step 2, came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.  This, to me, is reflected in, "you, God shield me on all sides."  As addicts we know, too, that God is that greater Power, which protects us from the insanity of addiction.  Like David, we addicts are inundated by enemies - some external, some internal.  Our lives out of control.  Then something happens and we come to believe, or more appropriately come to realize, that God does protect us and shields us on all sides.

Step 3, Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him.  This for me, is David's act of "With all my might I shout up to God."  Step 3, in order to be effective, needs to be in total commitment.  You need to be willing to shout to God with all your might - just as David shows us here.  With all of our might, all of our will.

And God's response to our faith and devotion?  "His answers thunder from the holy mountain."  For the addict, God responds by starting the recovery process.  We get to know a new freedom and a new happiness.  As the AA promises recite (not at verbatim or in its entirety), "We come to understand the word serenity and know peace.  No matter how extreme our addiction, we realize that our experience and our story can help others.  The feelings of uselessness and self-pity disappear.  Our attitude and outlook change such that we can intuitively handle situations that used to baffle us.  Until we finally realize God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves."  This is what Gods response, sounds and looks...no, this is what God's response feels like.

Dear God, thank you for your response.  Thank you for thundering answer from the mountain.  Thank you for doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.  Thank you for protecting us on all sides.  Thank you for grounding our feet and lifting our heads.  For without you, we would not know peace.  We ask that you continue to be with us and protect us.  We beg that you continue to guide us to be committed to your will for our lives that we will be able to live in this peace always.  Help us share this message to those who are in need of your protection and guidance.  Help us be open to opportunities to serve you and your people.  Help us show the light of your word and your love.  Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 2:7-9 (MSG): God said next, "...What do you want?"

Psalm 2:7-9 (The Message)
^7-9Let me tell you what GOD said next.
He said, "You are my son,
And Today is your birthday.
What do you want? Name it:
Nations as a present?  Continents as a prize?
You can command them all to dance for you,
Or throw them out with tomorrow's trash.

"Today is your birthday," you are born again, a tree replanted in the soil of Eden.  Your life starts fresh - today.  All those days spent in addiction, or greed, or hate...whatever - those are gone.  What do you want from your life going forward.  Do you have a dream?  Do you think that dream aligns with God's plan for you?  Maybe your dream is on a small scale but incredibly elusive - to be sober for a day (or another day).  Commit yourself to God have faith in Him and He can grant it.  I have seen lives transformed this way.  The key to this is having so much faith in God that you can expect this to come true.  Will you be able to find or "muster up" this much faith?

So, today think about what this new life means.  What will you grow and shine on in your new life - and what will you throw out?  Many things will be different.  Some things we obviously want to throw out.  Others we may want to keep but will not be able to.  For example, in a dream of sobriety, we understand the need to stop drinking and will throw that out.  However, we appreciate a happy hour after work with friends.  Let's be honest, that will likely lead to drinking so that will likely need to go, too.

God is giving us whatever we want - as long as we have the faith to live the life he wants us to lead.  Starting today we start making choices based on the life of our dreams.  Based how we think God would want us to use those gifts and resources.  Will we use these things selfishly or towards a purpose much greater than ourselves?  Will we take them for granted or will we treasure them or will we share them?

God, thank you for your gifts and resources - nations as a present, continents as a prize.  Thank you for this day, giving this day as a birthday to start anew.  Lead us in the way to make the most of those gifts - that our work and our lives would reflect the light of your word and your love.  Guide us not into temptation of addiction.  Deliver us from the evil of selfishness, greed, theft, and lying.  Let our sacrifices not be in vain, that they may be for the benefit of others.  That my success in this journey over addiction may be evidence of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of Life. Amen.


Thanks for letting me share.

Psalm 1:2-3 (MSG): You're a tree replanted in Eden

Psalm 1:2-3 (The Message)

^2-3Instead you thrill to God's Word,
      you chew on Scripture day and night.
You're a tree replanted in Eden,
      bearing fresh fruit every month,
Never dropping a leaf,
      always in blossom.

Oh my - it feels good to be back writing and praying.  I believe I have found a new journey, a new adventure.  I have found that recovery is on-going process which never really ends.  The affliction of addiction is never cured - it needs to be constantly managed.  Although I count my sobriety in weeks and months, instead of days, it still takes the same effort.  So, rather than simply repeating the same journey I will try to complete a new journey, using The Message translation.

Of all the translations of The Bible The Message stands out as unique.  This uniqueness will keep the journey fresh.  It's character stands out immediately in this first Psalm of my journey because it talks about you (and me) specifically.  Where most translations refer generically to the blessed, The Message refers to you.  Yes, you, are blessed, you, are a replanted tree.

Let's look at this metaphor more closely.  You are a replanted tree.  You have been given new life.  Taken from evil and toxic ground around us every day.  Taken from the ground where greed, theft, addiction, and lies fester and thrive.  Planted in the fresh soil of truth, honesty, and God's word.  You now have fresh new life where you are able to bear fruit.  Not unlike a light for God's word, you bear fruit that is intended to be shared with others for the sake of God's glory.  And in the same nature of God's glory you, not some generically blessed person, you are always in bloom.

Lord, thank you for giving us this day - a day that we can have of sobriety.  Be with us in this day that we may be strong in the face of our temptations.  Thank you for giving us psalms so that we can understand what it means to pray to You, be honest with you and rely on You.  Thank you for replanting us in Your word that we may be a light of Your word.  Let our actions authentically represent Your word and Your light.  Let us be a light for those who do not know Your word.  Let us be a light for those without hope, for those addicts who still suffer, or anybody who is need of Your love.  All this we pray in Your sons name, Jesus Christ, Amen.

Thanks for letting me share.